I woke up today found myself with wet eyes, I start to cry even harder. I hate myself for being like that. I'm not sure what's the feeling of me right now but I know 1 thing for sure - I'm hurt! I've always thought I can be the strongest one,the firm ones. But after going through so many stuff in my life I found out that I was too proud of myself.I wasn't that strong at all,I get influence easily..I'm not firm as well,all these while I've been trying so hard to cover all my insecurities that i hide. I basically still don't understand myself ..i think no one could.I thought i could always be the happy Griselda waif big goofy smile on my face,but I've overestimate myself,I couldn't be the Griselda with laughter all around every time.I dunno why God choose to put me in this kind of fate,I kept questioning although i know I shouldn't.He gave me a perfect start of my life,but he strikes me with challenges in the middle.I'm not sure how will my end be..I might stand up and fight for it;I might just gave up easily..I'm not sure yet..but i will still try my best to earn my crowns.I know nothing last forever in this earth but human tends to fight for everything in this earth.I guess I'm still one of them who still choose the bad choice of fighting for something which is not eternal.Someone told me life is not about the length,it's all about the process of how you fight for.